Warning Signs Part 2

Emergency instructions from Airtran:
(pictorial interpretation by Danielmatic)



"If there is an emergency (or if you feel otherwise inclined to do so) here is one good way to dismantle the aircraft."




"If the plane is being evacuated and you do not want wish to exert any effort in helping others, simply stand on the ground, waving and pointing your arms. This will also benefit those who are under the false impression that it would be best at this point to climb on top of the plane, instead of placing their feet on solid ground."





"If your plane makes a successful emergency landing in the high desert (near a mountain), exit the plane in a panic. Once you get to the bottom of the inflatable slide run like a banshee into the desert where you will have plenty of food and water. By spreading out in the wilderness, everyone has a much greater chance of being found quickly. "

warning signs

lately, I've been fascinated by warning signs.

Here's one that I saw on a water heater.















It's pretty complex, but I think you get the idea.



Then I saw this one on a moving van while driving to the Flint airport.





































"Packing Tape Should Not Be Used For Painful Practical Jokes."

I agree, I'm just not sure why this is on the side of the truck.

someone in this company is obviously carying scars from a bad college experience.


Tommorow's Edition: "Emergency Instructions from Airtran"

quick update

hey friends. Sorry for the silence.

I've been pretty swamped preparing for a last minute trip to LA to promote stock20.com

it went well. I will regale you with stories and photos later.

for now, here is a tasty treat (stock20's recent demo):

I prefer that you listen to this on an mp3 player, good headphones, or good speakers....

www.stock20.com/media/200603-stock20-demo.mp3

-Daniel

Quote of the Day:

"well... you didn't call during a commercial..."
-Anthony Petty (indicating his lack of interest in continuing our phone conversationl)

the best news story ever

I do feel bad for the guy who got the stiches, but other than that, I'd say the higher primates have it coming (especially the lawyers and politicians).

Go Monkeys!

read the story here

summarized article highlights for my lazy friends:

A petitioner complained that the monkeys were attacking lawyers and their clients and snatching their food.

Delhi suffers from a serious monkey menace, with scores of animals seen across the city.

The monkeys are mostly seen around top government offices.

*

Delhi's monkeys have gained a notorious reputation for invading homes, schools and government offices.

The monkeys who have moved into residential areas and official enclaves due to Delhi's shrinking forests, are said to have become a security threat.

Two years ago, the ministry of defence found some of its top secret documents scattered all over the place one morning.

It was blamed on the many rhesus monkeys which flock around the colonial-era building.

*

In a collaborative effort of The Daniel Rudd Media Group, and the James Bean Chancel Choir, the Super-BLOG is happy to offer you this small piece of tranquil reflection and meditation.

Be sure to listen with a good set of speakers or headphones (or put it in your ipod)

The Doxology

This will probably appear in the Starr Commonwealth Spiritual Development Video which I am about to complete.

**ps. Updated the boys blog with a video today (it's a view weeks old, but never before seen)
www.isaacandwill.blogspot.com

"That's my Dad"

I've always been quick to (proudly) say: "that's my dad"

today my dad was surprised by the president of Grand Rapids Theological Seminary showing up at his church to award him "Distinguished Alumni of The Year."

I'm so proud of him (Not just for this)

I wish I could be there watching it in the second service right now, but Isaac has RSV (no hospitalization), and Andrea's on her work shift.

In addition to his earned doctorate at GRTS my dad also holds an honorary doctorate from Cedarville University.

Eclipsing both of these honors, Isaac and Will think very highly of "Bompa".

Last night, (Saturday night--when most preachers are working up a sweat over their sermon) my dad was here putting Will to bed while Andrea and I took Isaac to the medicenter.

Later that evening I was rocking Isaac to sleep on the couch. As my dad was leaving he called out, "I love you" --just as I was whispering the same thing in Isaac's ear.

The irony of that moment was great, so I enjoyed it for a moment. Then...

...I leaned close to Isaac and told him, "That's *my* dad."

It's all Slipping Away

We have a tradition: Couch time.
Most mornings, I get up with the boys and spend the first hour with them, before mommy or the babysitter takes over (if it's a workday).

Couch time is special. We play. We cuddle. One at a time as the other waits in their corner of the couch.

But like the Starr Spangled Banner at professional sporting events, couch time gets shorter every morning.

Isaac just wants to get down and crawl.
Will doesn't want to be left out.

Tommorow we're going to listen to "The Cat's in the Cradle" together.

Then I'm going to look them in thier little eyes and say, "you guys are the dad"

2 new videos

2 new videos have been released at Isaac and Will's site:
www.isaacandwill.blogspot.com

Creativity

Remind us to know that the more we create out of love of an idea, the better our work, our lives, our influence, becomes.

-A simple Prayer from Ray Bradbury

I came across this while reading through some of the old "Backburner" Posts from my brother Andrew.

Guilty Pleasures

I've been "tagged" by my wife who was tagged by my sister (who turns out to be quite the lush) who was tagged by my brother.

So, with great hesitation I make my confessions.

I offer you my guilty pleasures:

1. thinking positive thoughts all day.
2. humming cheerily as I work (mostly inspirational music).
3. straightening things up around the house.
4. refilling the windshield washing fluid containers at local gas stations.
5. paying just a little bit more than I need to on my taxes (just in case).
6. using my imagination to "replace" cusswords with appropriate substitutes (like dang, or poo) while watching TV or listening to the radio.

Well, now that you know. I hope we can still be friends.

I tag my good buddy Vanilla Ice. And his biggest fan Dick Cheney

2 New Videos from The Boys

this is from Will and Isaac's blog, but worthy of a double-post.

Finally, more video clips:

If you liked Andrea's soup story/picture, you'll love the motion picture version. Shortly after, we were able to capture will in one of his "dramatic moments."

"Souper-boy"

"The Many Faces of Will"

-Daniel

If you can't stream them, you might try "right click > save target as" *download them to your hard drive, then find the file and play it.

Bono Rocks (in so many ways)

"Look, whatever thoughts you have about God, who He is or if He exists, most will agree that if there is a God, He has a special place for the poor. In fact, the poor are where God lives."

A very small slice of a very excellent homily, given by Bono at the national prayer breakfast in washington.

read the rest of it here

lost in translation

does anyone remember:
AYBABTU?

Sometimes foreign exporters do not fully understand the nuances of the languages they are translating too.

Sometimes they choose correct words, but not the right words.

>>

I bought some violent gifts (airsoft guns) for some of my buddies this Christmas (Phil M. don't worry yours is on its way, had to send it back)

It's funny, because everyone buys them so they can shoot each other (like paintball).

But the manufacturers don't want to get sued so they say the guns are for target practice only. Most have a sticker that says: "do not aim at animals or humans"

On James Bean's gun, some japanese translater wanted to make the point by expressing how many joules of energy are released by these weapons. But there must not have been enough room to fit it all on the sticker.

...if only there was a way to say "animals" and "humans" with just one word!

This may be my favorite translated sticker yet.

I can't imagine ever getting tired of hot-n-ready pizzas.

However, I have gotten bored of picking them up.

Try this little trick to spice up that process (it's had mixed reviews so far).

When the teenager behind the counter opens the box and says, "how does this one look?" Take the box firmly in your hands (allowing her to still retain at least a finger on it).

Lean in a bit. Then lean in some more.

Then start to take deep (noisy) breaths through your nose.

Allow these snorts to rattle in your throat a little bit.

Make sure that your face is so close to the pizza that the cashier will expect you to come back up with greese on your nose.

Then step away, look thoughtful, shake your head slightly and reluctantly, and ask to see another one.

crusty little faces

aren't the worst of it.

when my boys are sick, they have a hard time sleeping.
But they need to sleep to get better.
But they won't sleep if I'm in there.

So I stand on the other side of their door.

I can't leave.
I can't go in.
I just suffer.

They cry like abandoned orphans.
They think they are all alone.




We're starting lent early and giving up those bacteria farms known as "nurseries".

and so ends my career in medicine

I think I just lost the only patient in my practice.

Andrea's ear was bothering her yesterday so she asked me to take a look at it with my otoscope.

I was more than happy to oblige, since she is the first person to actually *request* my services since I purchased my $9 diagnostic tool at Walgreen's.

I've been locating at healthy eardrums whenever people will let me (mostly Andrea, the boys are completely uncooperative), and I've been studying pictures of infected eardrums on the internet.
With this substantial training supporting my diagnosis, I insisted that Andrea go to the medicenter on her way to work (since Walgreen's will not let me prescribe antibiotics).

Well, apparently the "professionals" at the medicenter did not find an infection. They said there was just pressure and she should take a decongestant. To add insult to injury, Andrea took their word over mine.

And so ends my medical career.

Thankfully, I didn't go down like the surgeons who sent this patient home with the pictured souvenir:



(full story here.)

>tomorrow I'll make another hiatus from my "day job" when I fill in for my friend Jerry at his church. Hope that goes better...

....those rudd boys

Andrea has become quite the photographer since recieving her digital camera for Christmas.

This photo was taken after the buddies got in trouble for hoarding toys.

Whenever they treat each other in unkind ways we make them go to the laundry basket and pray together.









If you haven't been to their site, you're missing some of Andrea's great posts and photos.

For my contribution, I'm working on some videos for their site which will be released in a week or so.

And if you haven't looked at some of their old pictures for awhile, you should definitely take a stroll down memory lane by visiting their first website.

I am a human again

From last thursday at 6am (when I left for a video shoot),
until Wednesday when I handed the (mostly) completed DVD into the hand of my client,
I have been a machine.
I had mimimal sleep.
I had minimal time with my boys.
I had minimal contact with other humans.
Even my bathing habbits were minmalized.
I consumed large quantities of cheerios and coffee.

But I made the deadline. The clients were happy. And now we can buy diapers for another month.

So I'm back to being human. I got to spend all of Wed. afternoon, and yesterday re-aquainting myself with my family.

My boys and I are back to our regular morning routines.

Later today I'll hang out with some friends, and lay down some new tracks for stock20.

When the final revisions are completed I'll post a link to the video.

Sorry for the absence.

Sorry for the silence. My schedule won't even out for another two weeks.

In the meantime here are some shiny trinkets for you blogavores.

Christmas was great andrea has some great posts.

Andrea and I published an online christmas update (with some great pictures of the buddies).

My friend Josh Bean tied the knot on new years eve. Much fun and dancing ensued. James Bean claims he has video.

My mom is now a digital photography and graphic design guru – spreading her photo-montages and msn slide-shows all over the civilized world. She's pretty good (and this with all her other talents).

My dad (nearing 60 years of age) tore up the basketball court when I invited him to our friendly Sunday night game. He scored his share, stole the ball incessantly, and distributed assists like cheap candy on halloween. (and phil got a little too personal with keith—that's all I will say about that)

The buddies are having a hard time tonight – we just found at that there playmate from Sunday was diagnosed with strep throat today. Isaac and Will adore their cousins and will do anything to emulate them – no significant temp yet, but we'll see.

Stock20.com plods along, still ranking low in google as as source for royalty free music (in spite of my shameless psuedo-googlebombing).

Google continues to amaze me. Gmail is the greatest. Google Maps kicks mapquest's lower hemisphere, and Google Earth is incredible (go ahead, take a look at my house. I'm kittycorner from the tennis courts). Now there is Google Moon. Try zooming in as close as you can. (and btw: your enjoying google's bloggin software right now.

There have been no updates to the Homstarrunner website for almost a month. The homestarr community is furious.